


water lillies bloomed from chaos (and love)

by raleighocean



Series: An Original Horror Story [5]
Category: American Horror Story
Genre: 2018-onwards, Character Development, Character Study, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Post-Apocalypse, witch!Wilhemina Venable
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-01-15 12:07:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18498631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raleighocean/pseuds/raleighocean
Summary: It’s not like they were connected to her by blood or a strong bond, but it was more like magic choose them in between perfection, chaos, love and something unknown to make them just perfect, broken and fixed as they were. Raleigh thought however, amidst her own broken pieces, that if something remained from their big love, it was all mixed in those three young witches: Zoe, Mallory and Madison. And she wasn’t going to give up in any of her lovechilds, as much trouble it could seem.





	1. the one where patience is a virtue (madison, pt. 1)

**Author's Note:**

> song: secret for the mad by dodie
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this, it's something i'll be working on from now on and I'll post it too in my tumblr!

Looking into it, Raleigh always hated Louisiana's summer. 

The heat, the humidity, it always made her feel like she was losing weight just by standing up. 

Destiny decided to make her come back in the middle of  _ fucking  _ summer in a cruel poor attempt of pulling her leg, not letting her to actually prepare something to fight against it. Loathing dresses, she had to stick with her old pair of shorts almost everyday holding how much it displeased her showing her legs...or any centimeter of her skin for that matter. 

Tightening her grip to her purse, she tried to take her mind off of that and keep trying to focus in the screen where her order would show up at any minute. 

Only a month back and she was breaking Cordelia's rules at its fullest. But she was craving, she needed her _sugar_ _intake_ to keep her brain working. The new diet Raleigh was following was meant to rise her weight from a healthy perspective, but Morgana helped her, what's she needed was an extra large order of chicken nuggets and a double sized milkshake. _And a Dr.Pepper._

Even when she went out of the store, the humidity feeling even worse because of the upcoming rainy clouds, she felt content. Content for being back, for starting to roll with the events, for being  _ home,  _ for being  _ alive. _

Cordelia also had forbidden her from driving, so when she got in the car Queenie’s smiling face was waiting for her. It was one of the few things Raleigh did obey, but she was fixing that soon. Raleigh handed her buddy in crime her order, getting a cheer out of her. That’s what she liked the most about Queenie: she was always up for a mischief - and breaking some rules.

“I thought you were ordering for both, not for the entire Academy,” the girl laughed, watching as Raleigh pulled her chocolate milkshake and took a good sip with the straw. 

“You know how the girls get,” Raleigh shrugged, putting the bag over her legs. “I love to see them battle royale their way for a chicken nugget.”

Bursting in laughter at the memory from a few nights ago, they took a couple of bites before Queenie drove off to the Academy. 

Out of everyone, Queenie was the fastest to warm up to Raleigh’s presence again and that was a very much welcomed gesture. Zoe still seemed to be taking her time, not really sure if her mentor was the same as she used to be. Mallory was having a hard time adjusting to Raleigh and Madison sleeping with her in the same room and tried to avoid them for the time being; she was still hurt because Cordelia gave her the scold of her life and she respected the Supreme an awful lot. Misty was a lost cause, Raleigh could still feel her cold and full of hurt eyes on her, her heart sinking behind her ribs and into a hole of fear quickly. And Cordelia...well, she was getting there but her professional approach left her feeling as terrible as it did looking into Misty’s eyes.

As a phantom pain appeared, Raleigh’s hand lingered in her own cheek. Being slapped by the love of your life was always a big no-no, even when she deserved all of it. She felt really lucky that Cordelia confined her along Madison and Mallory to that shared room instead of being kicked out of the Academy. 

“It’s a luck we have this weekend free,” Queenie put Raleigh down on Earth again, taking a right and then giving her milkshake a sip. “With Cordelia and Zoe away, we can relax a bit.”

“It’s not as if I have something to do aside of reading,” Raleigh chuckled at that, eating a few fries in one go. 

“C’mon, you like that, being in silence with your books and shit,” they weren’t that far from the house anymore and Queenie drove as if she had done that trip thousand and thousand of times. “You spent like twenty hours glued to a book back then,” the girl laughed openly and Raleigh shook her head a bit. “The other four were for eating, sleeping and fucking Mist.”

The memory made her stomach churn, and Raleigh focused her eyes out of the window. After taking a step back and watching how Misty and Cordelia moved on in her absence, still made her feel like that. Raleigh wasn’t proud of how the swamp witch and her handled their ‘relationship’; she spent five years mourning her, thinking she was good as dead upon hearing her in the other side of the line when she called Mallory to go pick her up.

“I helped Nan several times to bake,” Raleigh tried to defense herself. “And you with more dark magic stuff, which I hope  _ Cordelia  _ knows nothing about; and Zo with her powers and-”

_ And now I'm helping Madison.  _ She wanted to keep saying that, because back then she wasn't one of the few she was really close to. Maybe it was Fiona's influence working on her and later how she disappeared several times and acted basically as the worst out there, not that Raleigh blamed her fully for. 

“Okay, I get it,” Queenie interrupted her with a good laugh that made Raleigh feel full of warmth instead of dread. She was one of the few that was actually vocal about the problems Raleigh had with the two oldest members of the coven, so she knew when to pick up the cue of not talking about it. “Listen, why don't we set up movie night tomorrow? You literally missed a  _ fucking  _ ton of good movies and I'm making you watch them all.”

That little change in the conversation was more than welcomed, making the last minutes of the trip light and enjoyable. Not that Raleigh's mind couldn't work at two things at the same time, because even when she was talking with Queenie underneath she was also thinking about Madison. 

If there was one thing she was actually proud of herself, was the capacity of picking up little details from others. Like how Cordelia still closed her eyes a second upon hearing something that she knew would shocked her, or how Mallory played with her fingers when she couldn't word her thoughts. And in between details, Raleigh discovered Madison's. 

At meals she usually sat the furthest from them all, in silence and trying to eat unsuccessfully whatever couple of things she picked from the table. It worried Raleigh that her plate was almost full at the end, but anyone seemed to notice. She had seen her during her own sleepless nights going down to the kitchen and try to eat before running to throw up everything. Also it didn't help at all that her intake of cigarettes had doubled. 

As Queenie was starting to pull over by the Academy, Raleigh looked at the fast food bag in her lap. Obviously she had bought their cravings with some extras for the rest of the girls, but also she had picked a little pack for Madison. With the memory of the day they came back in her head, Raleigh had placed the order without hesitation. Desperate times needed from desperate measures, right? 

Queenie decided to have her meal in her room, wanting to keep watching a show while eating, but Raleigh decided to take over the kitchen. 

It was a feeling in her guts, as if whatever she was hoping for it was there - as when she was young and she was just too perceptive instead of having a  _ know-it-all  _ power. The sound of someone typing on their phone plus the ruffle in the kitchen cabinets made her feel a bit nervous, but Raleigh calmed herself while holding Madison's vanilla milkshake in her hand. The latina witch entered the room to discover Madison sitting there, phone in hand and cigarette resting in the ashtray, windows open to try and catch a lucky afternoon breeze. Misty was there too, making iced tea apparently, and Raleigh felt her giving her a quick look before going back to what she was doing. 

_ Shit that it hurt, but now wasn't the moment to dwell on it.  _

“Ready to see people battle-royalling over a chicken nugget?” Raleigh's voice made Madison look up to her, a soft smirk on her lips. 

“My bet this time goes to…” Madison contemplated her options for a second, taking a drag of her cigarette. “They'll drop that shit to the floor and at least one will cry over it.”

Raleigh chuckled at that, placing the bag in the counter before getting a couple plates and some glasses. Since Queenie had told them about what happened when someone left any kind of treat over the kitchen counter, it became something fun to bet for. I mean, they still were there getting used to live among witches again and they didn't have a lot to do, what else could they do? 

“A little one is going to get everything while the rest fight,” Madison huffed at that, underestimating Raleigh's bet. “Mark my words, they pretty smart.”

“Yeah whatever,” turning to her phone again, one earphone on to keep listening what she was watching, Madison lost interest in how Raleigh was placing food in one plate. “Where goes your bet swampy?” 

Misty sighed heavily, not wanting to get dragged to the conversation, and Raleigh gave her a sideway look before pouring the milkshakes from the plastic cup to the crystal glasses. Putting her palm over the rim of Madison's glass, Raleigh closed her eyes before muttering some words in latin really low but Misty caught her doing it. What was going on with her? Now she wanted to enchant the students? 

However she didn't say a thing nor stopped her. 

“Not placin’ bets on how the girls go crazy over food,” her tone more serious, showing how being around Cordelia had changed her a bit, made Madison huff again and Raleigh scratched the back of her head a bit. “And Delia doesn’t want junk food in the house since last time.”

“Don't be a pussy, Cordy is not even here,” Raleigh turned around with her two plates to place it by Madison's side, where she was going to sit. “I know you are next in charge when she and Zoe aren't here, but you were never the killjoy.”

“Whatever you say to make yourself feel better Maddie,” another sigh falling the Cajun's lips and Raleigh saw how Madison wanted to reply but instead chose not to. 

She knew the starlet would have started a big argument just for that, but this new persona that Madison was developing wasn't kind to being  _ too _ loud. Raleigh had noticed that too, as if she was up to throw the first brick but at the same time be reluctant to keep on throwing them. 

“I brought this for you cupcake,” the nickname made the youngest blonde to roll her eyes, but looked interested at the glass. “And french fries to stop a train, so you better eat some.”

Raleigh then noticed how Misty turned around as if she was going to say something, but when she saw how Madison barely touch the milkshake she leant back in the counter with a glass of iced tea in her hand. Biting her burger with the hunger of a pack of wolves, Raleigh waited for Madison to do something aside of keeping her attention in her phone. In the next ten minutes, she didn't even sip the milkshake and that both relaxed Misty - who was worried about whatever spell was placed there - and made Raleigh anxious - she knew for a fact that she skipped both last night dinner, breakfast and lunch. 

“I'll eat upstairs,” Madison finally said, standing up and taking the glass and a few chicken nuggets and fries in a bowl. “In case any of you need me.”

But when she was about to cross the kitchen door, it closed magically with a loud _bang_ that startled Misty and Madison, make them jump a bit. Raleigh kept eating as if she didn't notice and the young girl huffed annoyed before turning around to look at Misty. 

“So funny, did you want to play a prank on me?” she put down the bowl and the glass in the table again, confronting the confused witch. “Because I'm not taking any bullshit, swampy.”

“I don't know what're you talkin’ about,” Misty tensed to that, ready to fight back even when she was very much confused for what did just happened.

“Don't play the idiot, I know it was you,” she got closer to Misty and then the window did just the same as the door, but it didn't close just loud banged against the frame. “Stop or-”

“It was me,” Raleigh stopped the incoming fight without even lift her eyes from her food. Madison and Misty turned around, puzzled, to look at the other woman. “And don't ever talk to Misty like that or I'll slap the shit out of you,” the warning behind her words was enough to make Madison step back and look wherever except to Raleigh, who pulled the chair where she was sat previously and invite her to take a sit again. “Now sit, explain what the fuck is going on with you and eat.”

Both blondes looked at each other for a second and Misty knew, deep inside her, that she got caught in one of those moments she missed when they were all in the Academy. A moment were Raleigh wasn't being this entity she clashed with and instead was taking in her hands a real problem. She had heard from Zoe and Queenie - and from Cordelia, when she was tired and nostalgia made her feel overwhelmed - how Raleigh was capable to be a good mentor if she put her mind into it, but with everything that came with her returning, she wasn't believing it if she was being honest. 

To see Madison obey after a couple of minutes, at least in the ‘taking a sit’ part, was truly something else. Misty stood by the counter, leaning back again since she didn’t want to leave both alone. Cordelia told her in the privacy of their room if she could manage to ‘take care’ of them an extra bit more than the rest.

“Nothing’s going…” she was got quiet for a second, taping her fingers against the glass softly. “...that’s the problem, I think,” Madison tried to avoid visual contact and Raleigh let her that, waiting for her to keep talking. “I’m not going to be an actress anymore.”

Raleigh scrunched up her nose a bit with that soft whisper. She always wanted to ask her if she actually thought of herself as that, so at least her curiosity was fulfilled somehow. Maybe not in the good way but well.

“I can’t feel my magic anymore…” even as a trembling statement, it came with the determination of someone that was coming into terms with themselves. And that was a very brave thing to do.

“I couldn’t neither right when I came back,” Misty raised her voice shyly and Raleigh put the last of her burger in her mouth, as if she just wanted to listen to them talking. “It took me months to be able to bloom a flower, everythin’ used to die under my touch.”

“I bet screwing Cordy sped up the process,” there wasn’t malice behind the comment, it was just a simple ‘messing around’ type of comment that was welcomed by the other witch. 

“Actually it made it worse,” a soft chuckle that made Raleigh sip her milkshake while looking at her food so she didn’t have to see how her face was blushing lightly. “Dee has  _ too much _ magic and it kinda suck whatever I had left, so it got to the point where she had to make me potions to fix my ‘magic flow’.”

Madison actually chuckled at that and eased the tension in the kitchen. She was telling them her worries, but not  _ talking about  _ them. Raleigh was still glad that she could address her problems at least, it was easier for her to pick up more details. However, she wanted to counterattack the most immediate one: Madison's eating habits. If that wasn't taking cared of, the other problems wouldn't even exists. 

“That's why you aren't eating?” direct, Raleigh bit down half nugget and looked at her. Madison still refused to look anywhere else than her vanilla milkshake. “Are you too worried about not being a famous witch actress to even eat?”

Crossing the line she knew was there, the tension was up again. Raleigh caught Misty putting a confused face and when she looked directly at Madison, the girl was looking at her lap with serious face. She had spent three years buried in a ditch, waiting to heal; she could spend all the necessary minutes to let Madison explain herself. Silence overtook them yet again but it didn't stop Raleigh to keep having her meal. Lifting her eyes from the plate, she made visual contact with Misty for a second and it felt as if they never were giving this stupid ‘silent treatment’ to each other. It only took Raleigh a tiny gesture with her fingers to make the other witch round the table to stand by her side. 

Circling her thighs with an arm as sweet gesture and then resting her hand up in Misty's lower back, Raleigh sighed a bit.  _ That was something at least.  _ Misty left her glass in the table to take some fries with one hand and her free rested over Raleigh's shoulders naturally.  _ As if it was the most natural thing.  _

“It's just…like last time,” Madison mumbled, frowning slightly. “I can't feel anything, I don't know what else to do…if I try to eat, it taste like ashes and then my stomach gets upset and then I have to, you know,” she didn't say the word but she motioned with her hand making it obvious. When Raleigh nor Misty didn't said a thing, she chuckled darkly and shook her head. “This is why I didn't want to talk, you think I'm crazy.”

“Not at all,” Raleigh took the lead again, wiping her fingers in the napkin in front of her before placing her free hand between Madison's shoulder blades. “Look cupcake, and this comes from someone that is  _ allegedly _ batshit crazy, you are not,” it was then when her hand rested in Madison's nape that she actually looked at her in the eyes. The big word made the youngest giggle. “And  _ we  _ are here for you. We will figure something out to help you, but you have to let us.”

Upon looking up to the two women in front of her, Madison felt her chest tight. They weren't patronizing her, they were just  _ worried _ about her. Misty had a half smile on, as if she was encouraging her to keep going and take the words to her heart, with this spark in her eyes she lacked when they were at the Academy before the Seven Wonders; Raleigh was looking at her with maybe tenderness? It was hard to discern thanks to the terrible and scary scar that crossed her face took over any other emotion, but her hand not leaving its place at her nape was enough to reassure her of it.

What a weird feeling was that of feeling  _ taken care of. _

Tears pushed for freedom, but Madison held them in by just closing her eyes a second. Deep inside she knew it wasn’t necessary for her to reply at what Raleigh said, so she took that opportunity to just take the glass to her lips and finally sip at the vanilla milkshake. With her eyes closed, trying to pick the sweet flavour over the ashes one, Madison couldn’t notice how Raleigh seemed at ease with that gesture while Misty looked troubled for letting her drink when she didn’t know what spell the other woman had put in the beverage.

“I didn’t want to sound pushy,” it was a muttered unspoken apology while Raleigh withdrew her hand from Madison’s nape when the humidity and the heat started to become too much for her to keep touching her, skin to skin. “I’ll be happy if you drink at least half of that milkshake, or just a few more sips, whatever you feel like, okay?”

Madison nodded and Misty could see how something was worrying her by the way she had her eyes were fixated in her lap. She wasn’t a really patient person - the only bit of patience she had was when it came to use her green magic, and even then she still specially wasn’t - so the only thing to ease her nerves came in the form of stuffing a few french fries in her mouth. She couldn’t help but wonder how Raleigh managed to keep her cool that well, but again she realized she still had too much to learn about the woman’s true persona. Feeling her, however, with her hand resting in the small of her back, was a good start. It was also the first time they actually ‘touch’ since Raleigh came back, the first time they were kind of exchanging more than pained and angry glances - which were coming mostly from Misty’s side.

Each too busy inside their own heads, they didn’t expected what Madison did next.

For Raleigh was really strange to feel someone wanting to be that close to her, but she once let Zoe did the same several years ago. Madison wasn’t heavy, not at all, so it wasn’t something uncomfortable having her sitting in her right leg like a child. None of them said something but Misty’s grip tightened softly in Raleigh’s shoulder when the latter looked up to her, watching how the girl was dividing a chicken nugget with her fingers and nibbling at it. They were lucky the kitchen door was closed, because they made a really odd picture just eating in silence there, the three of them, as if they were the only ones.

“If any of you say something about this, I’m going to run over you two with my car,” Madison mumbled that as a warning after sipping her drink once again.

Raleigh couldn’t help but chuckle at that, giving her a few pats in her back, while Misty huffed in defeat before separate herself from the other two to refill her glass of iced tea. That was the old Madison trying to speak through the new one, making everything sound totally different than she intended. Not that the other two would actually say something, Misty considering if telling Cordelia was the right choice after the problem was ‘fixed’ at it seemed. 

They fell again in another comfortable silence, only interrupted by the soft  _ clinks  _ from the plates and glasses, as they keep eating. Madison managed to get through two chicken nuggets, four french fries and a quarter of milkshake before standing up from Raleigh’s leg, who finished off the rest of the food as if she was starving. The girl waved goodbye awkwardly to the other two and when they were sure she was far away from the kitchen, Raleigh sighed loudly before standing up to clean.

“What did’ya put in her drink?”

Misty turned around to watch Raleigh doing the simple task. They never got to be like that, such  _ domestic  _ setting.

“Why would I?” Raleigh shrugged with tiredness overcoming her voice, the hot water making her start to sweat again slightly. 

“I don’t know,” there was something in Misty’s voice that sounded like a mix of fear and anger. “I don’t know what’s goin’ on in your head.”

_ Anymore.  _ Both listened the silent word even when it wasn’t said at all. But that didn’t stop Raleigh to finish the task, drying her hands in a cloth. She didn’t want to look at the Cajun witch and face the confusion nor the anger, not right now when she spent the last bits of energy in trying to make Madison feel better.

“Do you know what’s vanilla used for?”

“What’s with that-“

“Appetite-inducing effect, or that they say, it was a risky move to do since I read that can be the opposite however,” before she could keep talking, Raleigh interrupted her. That was one of the things she used to hate of her, how she seemed to work in another plane of existence where she didn’t have to wait for anyone to give her an answer. “Even if it’s not the real thing what the milkshakes have, it still something,” another shrug, as if she was considering the options floating in her head. “I just busted it up with a couple spells. If she had upset stomach, it would do her some good, but I also did another one so the food stay where it has to stay just in case.”

Puzzled, Misty stood there speechless. Raleigh placed the extra order of chicken nuggets somewhere visible so when the other residents of the house came in time for dinner, they could find it easily. As much as she hated how  _ smartass  _ the other woman was at times, it also attracted her that side of her. Cordelia was a bit like that too, but in a different way, a softer one at least.

Patting her shoulder awkwardly, Raleigh took that as her cue to leave the kitchen. Too much interaction for her like in just one day, she was going to take the current book she was reading and find a silent shadow-y spot in the backyard to read until dinner. 

Yet still, she stopped before crossing the door.

“Misty?” her name was strange to her lips, used to call for her using her designated nicknames in the past. It would take a while to get used to the new situation. “You should talk to Cordelia about this once she’s back, she is the potioncraft genius after all,” another soft laugh falling from Raleigh’s lips that warmed Misty a bit. “Spells doesn’t last much, I’m afraid.”

After that, the Academy fell again in its day routine. It wasn’t the time yet to discuss or dwell in the past. Everything had to start flowing again, slowly but surely, so the right time could come.

Until dinner time, each of the ‘adults’ in the house occupied themselves in diverse stuff. Queenie had fallen asleep to her show after finishing her burger; Madison kinda took a nap too with her earphones on and blocking the sound of the chattering in the halls and rooms; Raleigh finished her book within a couple hours, keeping herself in the backyard enjoying the silence; and Misty tried to keep an eye on the girls before going to their private collection of books to pick up some of Cordelia's notebooks about botanic. 

But when the time arrived, their resident voodoo witch gathered them all outside the kitchen back door just to witness the said battle royale from before. Misty actually placed a bet in the end - “one of the oldies gonna hit a youngie in their way” - and they waited patiently for it to happen. Mallory was the first one to appear for dinnertime and she completely ignored the junk food, but when the rest of the students came in that was a battlefield. After a few minutes they caught a youngling teleporting without the rest noticing, the full chicken nugget container in her hands. 

“Shit girl, that's not fair,” Queenie complained jokingly along Madison's annoyed huff. “You're using your power to win.”

“I don't know what are you talking about sister,” Raleigh laughed openly, gesturing them with her fingers to hand over the cash from the bet. “I was this lucky before you were born; now hand the money my good witches, mama has to buy a laptop.”

The three witches looked at the oldest of them with something similar to awe, maybe because they didn't see her that relaxed in forever. 

Although they still missed how her eyes didn't spark with that happiness she seemed to feel.


	2. the one with the catch up (zoe, pt. 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> new chapter, new daughter! Let's get some catch up for the time being, not all hearts are healed the same, am I right? I loved writing this one, so I hope y'all like it!

It was just a tug of magic what woke her up. 

Zoe stood up with the easiness of someone that had done that multiple times. After the coven went public and they had a larger amount of students coming to them, that was something that used to wake her up easily. They had too much magic under one roof, so even the slightest change affected all of them. 

At least, all of them that were able to feel it. 

Sometimes it was just one of the younglings waking up before their usual schedule, other times it was an older student trying to go over yesterday's lesson just in case. But this time it was something she used to yearn to feel again for years. It was old, like Cordelia's magic; but cold instead of hot and ardent, like the autumn rain. It made her feel like she could take the whole world with only sheer determination and probably a can of soda. 

Zoe was glad to have a room for herself, because she didn't like to cry in front of people.  _ Not that she liked it before, but she was always prone to do so.  _

She missed this, God. 

All the magic she once got used to live with was there reunited. In her own way, Zoe felt like her  _ true _ family was finally complete, at least for the time being. After all that time, she always had a little negativity chiding in to remind her to stay grounded. 

Wiping her tears, she got up from the bed and walked towards one of the windows, trying to peek into where that soothing source of magic was, pulling at her. It was a blessing that Cordelia decided to restructure the whole Academy, so their rooms - Queenie's and hers, since the master room was already there - faced the backyard too. There was Zoe and Madison's old room in the other end of the corridor, waiting for someone to take it. 

Someone as in the woman doing push-ups in the backyard. 

Or that's what Zoe hoped but Cordelia was still getting used to Raleigh's presence in the house again. Sharing room with Madison and Mallory was the nearest thing as a punishment for the trouble caused in that day, to which Raleigh didn't complain about or even fight. 

Many years ago her mentor - Zoe still thought of Raleigh as that, her mentor, the one that always cheered for her - had confessed to her that it didn't matter what happened between the, now, Supreme and her, because she would always love her no matter what. It was a fact that popped out in Zoe's head as the days passed by, as she noticed how the taller woman tried her best to please Cordelia without letting herself be belittled or change her behavior. 

Looking at Raleigh through her room's window, Zoe wondered if it was the right time for her to finally give her a chance. Since the day the woman came back, she felt…hesitant to put it in one word. Maybe it was the phantom pain in her left arm, where the elektrokinesis left her a huge scar; or maybe it was that her favourite student did  _ all  _ of that behind her back for Raleigh; or maybe because Queenie and her listened to Cordelia cry and cry again after she was left alone with too much weight on her shoulders.

The magic that was tugging at her did it a bit stronger and then Zoe discovered how Raleigh was starting to walk away. 

If she was going to do something, it was now or never.

Raleigh turned around at the sudden sound of someone calling out her name. Her eyes tried to find the source and soon she realized the figure in one of the windows from the second floor. Seeing Zoe there, waiting for her to talk, was like a shot of warmth to her heart that started to spread slowly through her whole body.

“Good morning to you too,” she felt herself about to smile, but stopped from do so just in time. “I thought you’d wake up later.”

“Yeah, well,” Zoe’s voice was a bit muffled by the distance but she heard her just fine. 

“Everything’s okay?” Raleigh asked when Zoe fell silent after that. She was feeling how her muscles were starting to relax and she still had to run a bit, but she was worried about whatever made the young witch to reach out for her.

“I was thinking…” with her hand in her forehead, Zoe seemed to try to say something coherent. “Do you mind if I join you? In your early jog, I mean.”

“Why would I mind, sweet pea?” Raleigh couldn’t help but laugh surprised at that. “Chop chop, I’ll wait for you in the street.”

The old nickname rolled from her tongue easily and the awkwardness stayed with her, even when they both were jogging side by side twenty minutes later. In exchange with Madison, with which Raleigh was starting to warm up to, Zoe was someone she still was trying to be careful around. Out of all the reactions she expected - and not -, hers was the one that made her feel like she failed at something. Zoe kept looking at her from the distance for days and when she finally talked to her, it was a simple and quick ‘thank you’ because she helped her with some books.

Was it indifference? Well, whatever it was, it was killing her slowly.

Raleigh wanted to apologize with Zoe the most for a lot of things. For letting her down, for leaving without giving her some more guidance, for using her powers on her, for not being there when she was needed, for letting her  _ die.  _

She had to close her eyes for a second to erase that last image from her head. Sure that she was going to dream again of that, Raleigh looked at the  _ real  _ Zoe running by her side, jumping to sort a hole in the sidewalk and smiling like a child for such little achievement.  _ Grab that new memory, grab it and push it against the old one.  _ It was something that was advised in one of the several books she had read in the last month, and it helped with small things that used to make her panic but with big things like that was more difficult.

Enjoying the silence while running, Raleigh wanted that moment to last forever. 

Zoe didn’t seem to complain about going further from the Academy, so she kept her usual route towards the park. That park was her little breather after she came back, something none knew about, but it felt right for her to give it to Zoe. Maybe so she could make it her breather too or take it forever as hers and only hers, it didn't matter. 

As long as Zoe was fine, it was fine for her too. 

When they arrived to the park, Zoe's lungs were burning. She had a good while without going for a run or exercise at all, too caught up with stuff at the Academy and with the Council to even make a little time for that. She used to do it when they still were a few after Cordelia's raise to the power, but then she was too tired for it. Her legs felt like jelly when she managed to sit in a bench and she swore under her breath because of it.

"I feel like throwing up," she joked trying to not lie down there. 

"I felt like that a few weeks ago when I started," Raleigh was soon by her side, with a bottle of water in her hand that she took immediately, downing the water quickly. "Easy kiddo, or you're going to throw up for real."

Zoe chuckled while the other woman sat by her side, all her magic in display for her to feel it again. 

"I'll be lucky if I can move at all," another laugh and that one made Raleigh crack up a little smile. "How you do it? Is it what Cordelia makes you eat?" 

"Oh god no," she shook her head and then put her hands in the big pocket from her hoodie, taking out the most sugary cereal bars she had laid her hands on. "This is the real deal. Two essays about some plant, which I had to reword differently, and a low level spell it's what costed me," then Zoe's eyes narrowed a bit at that and Raleigh pointed at her. "Now missy, what I told you once? Snitches end up…"

"...in ditches…" she completed, rolling her eyes and chuckling a bit more. 

"...with stitches," that last bit was told at the same time before Raleigh gave Zoe one of the cereal bars. "So I hope this doesn't get its way to our dear boss."

Zoe couldn’t help but nod in agreement at that, smiling a bit awkwardly, and then she took a bite of the cereal bar. Cordelia was stressed out because of the woman she was sharing food with, it wouldn’t help anyone to stress her even more at the end of the day. Also, she couldn’t wait to hear from Misty how two of her students marked the highest score in an essay for once. She wasn’t that sure if the spell would actually work, since it was something more complicated than just a bunch of words thrown together. Zoe had the feeling that Raleigh didn’t tell that part to that one student on purpose, since it was own area of expertise and she knew how much it annoyed her.

Taking off her sweatshirt, Zoe got the little memory from a class they four - Madison, Nan, Queenie and her - had with Raleigh about spells. She never had seen her that...angry yet passionate about something. Only Nan was able to get the practical part done, but everything got stuck in their heads. Even in Madison’s. 

Without knowing what to say aside of keep the sweet silence between them, Zoe was about to follow that line of old memories to calm herself a bit. Until she felt soft fingertips against her arm, grazing ever so softly where her skin was different, and her eyes went first to Raleigh’s hand and then to her face.

The look of utter panic in the woman’s hazel eyes made Zoe shake to the core.

“It didn’t hurt,” her words were almost a whisper, looking at the marks that never fade away. “I woke up and it was sore, that’s all. Not even the blisters hurt.”

“Your heart,” she never saw her that distressed and Zoe took her hand quickly, forgetting about how she felt about touching all of a sudden.

“You didn’t electroshock my heart, only my arm,” taking a deep breath, Raleigh’s body trembled like an autumn leaf. “Believe me, Cordelia kept monitoring me for a whole month to make sure I wasn’t going to have a stroke.”

She chuckled at that, trying to make the older woman laugh too, but she didn’t succeed. 

“Now I know why you didn’t want to be near me,” Raleigh muttered again. “Or any of you for that matter.”

Zoe thought she was going to let go of her hand, but she didn’t. And as much as her head told her to pull away, her heart overcame that tiny voice and stood still where she was. It was difficult to form words at this point, but soon Raleigh was talking again and doing the job she was so afraid to get done.

“When I was gone...how things were at the Academy?” her tiny question was full of curiosity but also something that escaped Zoe’s comprehension.

“The first few months after that were...a bit hellish, not gonna lie,” she replied, frowning slightly to the memory. “You’d had started a riot I swear, the first riot under any reign of a Supreme. The girls were so...messy? They had like no control. Myrtle stayed around until...well, she ended up in the Ancient room; but she helped to settle things,” Zoe missed how Raleigh had to look away for a second with that last bit of information. “Queenie and I thought we were going full breakdown at some point, but when Misty came back...Cordelia just got like a shot of energy and soon we were going smoothly over everything,” Zoe laughed at that, her thoughts messy but clear at the same time? it was difficult to put three years in a few words.

“Please tell me someone caught the kitchen on fire at least,” Raleigh’s soft smile caught her off guard. “I don’t believe everything was smooth for the next three years after that.”

Right there is where Zoe saw a side of Raleigh she never thought she would see. It was like she was...open to whatever Zoe was willing to tell her and that was a huge change of demeanour. When they were at the Academy back in Fiona’s last days, Raleigh always seemed too caught up with whatever was going in her head and every time someone wanted to talk to her it was a nightmare. As if she didn’t care at all.

But having her there, with clear eyes and clear feelings, made something in Zoe turn and ease. And she dove in it, the peace Raleigh used to give her in the past before everything went downhill and seemed to be back now.

Raleigh couldn’t help but keep smiling when Zoe started to relax and spill every bean in the pot. Hearing her laugh with every turn and get really serious in the best parts, it made her heart squeeze and wait with expectation for the way a new giggle started to show in Zoe’s features. She listened carefully to every detail, taking it as the actual  _ truth  _ instead of all those memories her brain was trying to push over it. And even when Zoe entered the days in which Cordelia and Misty started to be a thing, she didn't flinch nor told her to stop. 

Raleigh was starting to feel okay with that, it didn't hurt as much as three months ago. 

"...I swear, you would had smacked their heads like pumpkins," Zoe laughed one last time at that, followed by a low chuckle from Raleigh and then sighed content. "Queenie did the best impersonation of you though."

"Oh really?" Raleigh raised an eyebrow, amused with the image in her head. 

"Completely," Zoe rubbed her thighs with both hands, shaking her head a bit before falling silent for a couple of seconds before saying the next thing. "She laughed at it."

"Hmm? Who?" 

"Cordelia," the name rolled between them easily, both not wanting to look at each other. "She laughed for real, I think I've never heard her laughing like that," Zoe looked down to her lap and smiled softly. “Even Misty got surprised, we couldn’t make her crack more than a smile.”

Zoe looked at Raleigh after that statement only to find her smiling ever so softly, holding all this sadness in her gesture. Maybe she crossed the line with that, her mind trying to come up with something to change the flow of the conversation. But something in her, the part that was buried with Cordelia’s tears, made her keep pushing down the same line.

“She missed you, a lot; she cried rivers for you,” she mumbled, the old annoying tingle of anger in the back of her head. “Yet she laughed because of you.”

“No, Zoe,” Raleigh’s tone was soft, making the anger vanish as if it was her mother who was talking to her. “You all made her laugh, made her happy,” her hand went to Zoe’s nape and gave her a light squeeze there. “Not me.”

“She is happier now that you are here,” 

“We both know that’s not true,” Raleigh then stood up, stretching her arms over her head and then offered a hand to the young teacher. “Let’s go back, it’s getting late.”

As if that last sentence pushed a button, Zoe’s phone started to ring. And it was the woman they were talking about, calling to know where she was since apparently they had council meeting that morning. When she hanged up the phone, Raleigh couldn’t help to chuckle.

“What a troublemaker,” Zoe whined a bit when she finally stood up with Raleigh’s help, her legs feeling like wood sticks. “Can you walk?”

“I can try,” giggling, the young witch took a few careful steps before starting to jog a little, feeling less sore by doing that than walking. “Oh no, this means that I’ll have to keep running until we arrive there?”

Raleigh shook her head before starting to jog by Zoe’s side. She didn’t want her to get in trouble with Cordelia, even less if it was her fault. So with care they started making their way back to the house, but Zoe only made the half of it before her legs decided to not take it anymore. While looking for a solution to their problem, Raleigh thought that next time her protegeé decided to go running with her, she would take her not that far from the Academy or at least make her warm up before going full throttle.

"Queenie is going to laugh her ass off," Zoe was covering her face with both hands, sitting in the sidewalk. 

"Queenie's always laughing her ass off," Raleigh put her hand in Zoe's head, patting it lightly. "Why don't we call a cab?" 

"That's like giving her the gun with six bullets and refill," another grunt and then her voice sounded more tired. 

And then the idea came to Raleigh's mind like a shooting star. 

Zoe couldn’t think what crossed her own mind to agree to that, but it was worth the shot. She tightened a bit her hold, afraid of falling, but the hold on her legs was strong enough to not let her. It only drew a chuckle from the other woman, her breath a bit caught in her throat. Like a child having a piggyback ride from her parents, Zoe hid her face in Raleigh’s neck, embarrassed for the position. If they wanted to arrive not that late, it was the only solution.

Arms sore to sore legs, what a pair.

“We can’t say a thing about this,” she mumbled in her embarrassment. 

“The secret is forever ours, sweet pea,” Raleigh laughed openly at that, her hands going to a bit back to accommodate Zoe in her back better. “I’m dropping you a street from home, so none will ever know.”

Nodding softly, she knew the older woman wouldn’t break her promise. Now Zoe’s mind was too focused in how to make Cordelia not go full on rant about how irresponsible she was or whatever crossed her mind in that moment. Not that the Supreme ever did that, well, not in the last times - Zoe still remember the only time Cordelia was mad at her and it wasn’t even that, she was just serious. But the worry still ate her alive for some reason.

“Remember the first time we talked more than ‘read that spell’?” Raleigh brought her back to Earth with that tiny remark. “You were so...scared, I didn’t know what to do.”

After all those years, Zoe still had that memory as one of her favourites even with the sad undertone. It was after the zombie attack, too tired to be with the rest, both witches had found themselves side by side in the backyard sharing theirs cups of tea and their thoughts. Strange at it was, they talked about love in some way.

“Any boy in sight?” Zoe repeated the question trying to imitate the latina witch. 

“Love is always a good topic to keep the mind out of the worry,” Raleigh’s laugh was something so rare to hear back in the days that having her being like that was really something else. “At least in teenage girls,” she shrugged lightly and tilted her head enough to bump into Zoe’s. “And you ended up having one, so I wasn’t that wrong.”

“Yeah well,” Zoe frowned a bit and then sighed softly. “It didn’t work out in the end, so what was the point after all.”

“That’s what I noticed,” another sigh and Zoe felt Raleigh’s thumbs caressing her thighs with care for a second, as if she was reassuring her in some way. “Sometimes be like that, sweet pea, we can’t control that stuff.”

“You know about that a lot, don’t you?”

“Heck that I do,” a sad chuckle but the woman still found the will to do it. “And that’s why I can tell you that something will come your way, when you least expect it,” Raleigh coughed a bit, the tiredness of carrying both Zoe and her own body was starting to show up. “I may not have my Sight anymore, but my mother said the tingle is forever so I’m positive about it.”

Zoe was glad that Raleigh was too tired to keep digging in the new topic, because she still couldn’t wrap her head in how everything the woman said was so close to the truth. Kyle and her didn’t work out, yeah, but they broke up almost two years ago and her heart had already fixed itself with much care and... _ love _ . She wasn’t sure if that love was actually mutual, but she was looking forward to it as much as she could.

Not even when they stopped a street away, as they accorded, she could get her head from her new  _ hope.  _ Both kept walking in silence for the rest of the time, side by side as if they were used to exercise together or as if they never grew apart. And Zoe liked that, she missed that so much that her chest felt full of energy even when they both were drained.

Stopping in front of the fence, they shared a meaningful look.

“Blame it on me,” Raleigh whispered as she put her hand in one of the bars, ready to press her magic against it and open. 

Putting her hand over Raleigh’s, Zoe didn’t say anything about that but nodded to let her know that she did listen. Having their magic flows together once again felt like coming home after a long, long time, and even with that everything was worth it for some reason.

When they saw Cordelia standing by the main stairs, waiting worriedly for Zoe apparently, Raleigh’s whole demeanour changed again. She softened and her magic was nowhere to be felt, her hands ready in case she had to explain something to the Supreme...but any of that was necessary because the blonde woman seemed to forget what she was going to say as soon as she spotted them side by side. 

“I’m sorry for being late Cordelia,” Zoe was the first one to say something. “We got lost in time and went too far awa-”

“It’s okay sweetheart,” the sweet word was followed by a soft smile from the Supreme, who gestured with her hand towards her office. “Misty and Queenie are waiting for us, go ahead and I’ll be there in two,” the young woman seemed relieved that her boss didn’t seemed mad at her at all.

Zoe never knew if both women shared something after she left them, but in her heart she felt like she owed one to her mentor. A little one at least, for the ride back home in her back and for keep trying to reach for them even when they didn’t want her at first. Show her some...respect maybe? No, the word she was looking for was  _ trust _ . Zoe sat there, listening to what they were discussing and trying to not focus in how much her legs hurt, while a part of her mind started to wander around that little thing.

How to submit  _ that  _ request to an audience that was divided in opinions? But she was the ‘actual’ head of the council, her opinion was stronger...right? Taking a deep breath when they seemed to be done with the main concern of the meeting, she stood up before the rest did.

“I have a request to submit to the rest of the council members,” Misty and Queenie looked worriedly at Zoe, still not used to hear her serious voice. “And to our Supreme.”

“What’s the matter?” Cordelia’s brown eyes were full of curiosity, her hands resting over her desk, waiting patiently for her to talk.

“It’s about our sisters, Raleigh Ocean and Madison Montgomery,” she felt the temperature go down in the room, but she kept at it. 

They were then in silence, waiting for her to say everything. Zoe had to remind herself to not cross paths with both Cordelia and Misty for the next following days, but seeing Queenie crack the tiniest of the smiles encouraged her more. Madison was something she was going to suggest eventually, after much deliberation between Queenie and her, so why not push it too?

“I think it’s time for them to be useful for this coven again.”


End file.
